Post-Divorce Advice

Divorce is over. You are emotionally, physically and financially drained. You have been through this nasty business of parting your life at every possible level and you believe your pet’s life is better than yours. At last, you think, it is over and you are done with it. But fasten your seat belt for a ride of life after divorce. Post-divorce life can be as tormenting as was going through it. However, it can be less chaotic and nerve-racking if you don’t let go of your control immediately after divorce.

Post-divorce advice can be a helpful guideline when your brain is still rattled by left-over emotions. Organize your life before breathing the air of relief with following tips on post-divorce life.

LEGAL ADVICE ON POST-DIVORCE-

Pursue Paperwork: You shouldn’t leave the post-divorce papers entirely on your attorney. Read all the rights and clauses applicable for you post-divorce. You should be clear with all the ramifications of divorce.
Alimony Details: Be sure to understand the amount, mode of payment and the interval of receipt/sending. You should be aware of your legal rights in case the alimony has stopped prior to stated period of time.
Surname Change: It is important to reflect your social status in all your documents and social dealings like government agencies of tax, voter registration, etc, banks, insurance company, passport and so on. You can retain your name prior to marriage, in case you have changed your surname. You should also communicate this change in your friends and family circle. For women in India, it is a big step and should be dealt calmly.

FINANCIAL ADVICE ON POST-DIVORCE–

Close Joint Accounts: Though it should be dealt before divorce, if not, you should close or withdraw your name from all jointly held accounts.
Property Distribution: As per divorce papers, you should understand clearly what all assets and financial help you will be receiving/parting. This will organize your finances and help you better in dealing with your future plans. Read thoroughly when you are entitled to receive the payments and asset possession. Women should pay attention to divorce papers and not leave it to your father or brother to handle.
Financial Plan: Before making any rash decision about handling your new financial status and investment, you should consult and educate yourself with good investment schemes and your resources and expenses. Open new checking and saving accounts and carefully invest your limited resources in insurance and pension plans that include health insurance, life insurance, car and house insurance. You are on your own now, you should handle your finances independently.

SOCIAL and PERSONAL POST-DIVORCE ADVICE –

Social Communication: You shouldn’t cut yourself from family and friends. Though their steely stares and gossiping irritates you, makes you creep back into your den but it is time they understand and respect your decision. Gradually, you would feel the comments and awkward moments fade. Keep yourself connected at primal level at least.
Understanding Your Moods: As much important is to accept people’s ugly sarcastic remarks, it is even more important to deal with your changing moods. Insecurity, depression, anger and isolation are few symptoms of post-divorce life. You can keep a check on these emotions by talking to your close friends, joining groups, maintaining journals and busying yourself in work.
Child Care: Do not forget that however much you have been through, your child needs constant care and even more during this time. Your child is your own love and must not be treated as a medium of release of your frustration. Moreover, using child as a pawn for revenge from your ex is equivalent to denying his custody for child’s welfare. Though dealing with financial burden of child support and your own emotional turmoil can take toll on yourself, let your child know that you care.

Dealing with divorce, in India especially, leaves you battered. However, organizing yourself with the help of post-divorce advice will make your life less troublesome.